Some guys said they'd rather be masturbated by another guy, since he would already know how to do it. However, no girls said they would prefer to be masturbated by another girl. Many guys implied either that their girlfriends already know how to pleasure them, or could readily learn how. Girls more often implied or stated that their boyfriends need to learn how to masturbate them right.
Where a position was described, most often it was for the 2 people to sit tandem, front to back. The giver would be behind the receiver so he or she could reach around the receiver and use a grip similar to what the receiver uses when going solo. Also in this position, the giver could use the non-stroking hand to stimulate the receiver's erogenous areas other than penis or clitoris.]
I'd have them stand in the shower and masturbate me from behind. One hand should reach between my legs to grab my scrotum and testicles. The other hand would reach around me to stroke my penis.
- age 26, California
It depends a bit on my mood, I guess. Rough and fast feels good sometimes, while calm and slow feels good at others. But in general, I'd tell the person to be gentle, slow, and not use too much pressure. I'd also teach the person various techniques I prefer to use.
- age 19, Norway
First and foremost, I'd allow only a man to masturbate me, because only a man knows how to masturbate another man. And I'd let him do it only if I knew he masturbates. I'd tell him to grip me loosely and go really fast so my penis really tingles. If I were married, my wife and I would have to learn from each other first by experimenting in sex before intercourse.
- age 25, Oklahoma
I usually tell the girls to use lots of lotion, and squeeze almost firmly enough to pull the skin, so her hand just glides along nicely. I also ask them to gently fondle my testicles with their other hand. When my hand and collar bone were broken it was impossible for me to masturbate, so I asked my friend to do it for me. Because it was such a favor, I didn't give him any instructions.
- age 17, Ohio
If the person were a woman, I'd rather just have sex because even with instruction, they usually just don't get it right. But with a guy, I'd tell him to do it the way he likes to do it to himself. That way, I might learn what different types of grips and strokes feel like. Since another guy has the same equipment, he should know how to do a good, pleasurable job.
- age 34, Florida
First, I want K-Y lotion all over my breasts and my vagina. Then I want my partner to rub my nipples and slowly work his way down to my vagina. I don't want him to go for my clitoris immediately — no, save that for last. I want him to start with one finger, add another, and then massage my clitoris. That is how someone can give me an earth-shattering orgasm.
- age 17, Canada (female)
The touch of someone masturbating me is such a turn-on that I would not really be too particular! However, my preferences are for a firm but gentle touch. I also like to be masturbated dry instead of lubricated. It is also important to be ready to keep stroking at a constant speed for as long as it takes. When I am close to orgasm I want them to speed up and apply more pressure all the way through my ejaculation. I want to tell them when to stop so I don't miss out on any pleasure.
- age 26, North Carolina
Grip the base with thumb and forefinger and stroke the rest of the penis all the way up and down at an even tempo. Use a fairly firm, well-lubricated grip. It's a fairly tough little piece of meat; don't worry too much about hurting it!
- age 16, Minnesota
I would tell them to stroke it slowly, and to stroke the whole penis. Also, don't stop and go. That is such a turn-off for me. If you are going to play with my testicles or scrotum, be careful! It's sensitive down there. If I start to whimper or moan, don't slow down. Speed up slightly, but don't give it the death grip. And unless you want a real mess, be careful where you point that thing! If done right, it should only take 7 or 10 minutes.
- age 23, Oklahoma
I'd say go slowly and be gentle. I can't adequately express how turned off I get by people going too fast or doing it too hard. It makes me not want to be masturbated at all.
- age 15, Washington (female)
When another guy is masturbating me, I tell him to masturbate me as he masturbates himself. I find I have a more intense orgasm that way. I masturbate other guys as I masturbate myself. Only when a girl does it do I give her instructions on how to masturbate me. I prefer to have a guy masturbate me, anyway.
- age 23, Michigan
I would want them to sit behind me, reach around me, and grab my penis. I would like them to do it normally, starting off slowly and then increasing speed. I would like a lot of pressure around my penis. I would also like them to massage my scrotum and testicles while they're doing it.
- age 16, New Jersey
When I have masturbated with another male, it has helped for me to tell him what I want done. Likewise, he would tell me what he wants done while I masturbate him. The thing I most enjoy when another male masturbates me is when he sits down on the floor and I sit right up against him with my back to his chest. This may seem odd at first, but I prefer it because it lets him grip my penis with the standard grip I normally use when I masturbate. Also, with him sitting behind me, he can stimulate my scrotum easily. In this position, I like for him to roll my foreskin back and forth over the head of my penis at first, so I become very aroused. Then I like him to lubricate my penis and stroke it slowly at first, gradually increasing the speed. It is also very satisfying for us to breathe in unison, increasing the depth and speed of breath as the session continues, while he rubs my scrotum or roams his other hand over my chest. I let him know when I am about to climax so that just then he can rub my perineum very firmly. The resulting orgasm is always *very* intense.
- age 17, Nebraska
K-Y is the best lube. When you put it on my penis, use your whole hand to stroke at a pace good for you. Place your free hand on my testicles and fondle them. Press on my perineum [area between my anus and scrotum]. Sometimes a vibrator placed strategically on my anus will give some mind-shattering orgasms when used while playing with my testicles. Of course this is more exciting when done while watching a good video, or when outside in the backyard, or just nude lying on my satin sheets. Finally, a well-placed, lubricated finger can do the trick!
- age 29, Texas
I would ask that they begin with slow, full strokes all the way up and all the way down the length of my penis, but barely applying any pressure or touch. As time passes, they should increase speed and pressure, never holding my penis with too much force and still moving the entire length of my penis. With their other hand I'd want them to play with my scrotum and testicles, alternating between squeezing them one at a time, and together. When I feel my orgasm coming, I would ask that they switch to short strokes with great speed and moderate pressure. When I climax, I want them to keep masturbating me until my penis becomes soft again. This leaves me with an ultimate climax and lots of other pleasure. I have done this to myself often, and wish I could relax and have someone else do it to me, but I have not ever fooled around with anyone else.
- age 17, California
Use enough lubrication (oil) so your hand(s) can slide smoothly, but not overly slippery over my penis. Slowly stroke it from the glans to the bottom of my shaft. The grip should be firm but not tight. Take your time. Play with my testicles, and rub the insides of my thighs from time to time. As I get more excited, stroke only halfway down my penis until I reach orgasm.
- age 47, Georgia
First I would show them how I do it. I'd have them use the normal "Fist" method and ask that they vary the speed and pressure. Normally I like to start slow with little pressure and build up to faster with more pressure. Also, I'd ask if I could masturbate them at the same time, to make it even more fun for both of us.
- age 17, New Jersey
Different partners have masturbated me very successfully with different techniques, so I don't have any detailed instructions. However, I do have a few hints I've given to girlfriends. Don't be too gentle. My erection is not fragile — and it's friction that gets me off. Stroking my penis anywhere will eventually make me climax, but touching the tip is especially pleasurable. And most important, don't stop once I begin ejaculating. Half an orgasm is very frustrating.
- age 27, Alabama
I would like my partner to stand behind me and kind of wrap herself around me, and use her right hand to masturbate me slowly and lightly. Her right hand could stroke me and touch me in other places on my body at the same time.
- age 17, Sweden
Since this would be the first time anyone else masturbated me, I am not sure. I am uncircumcised, and the tip of my penis is very sensitive. I think I'd ask her to massage the tip gently, maybe with her fingertip lubricated with saliva or oil, unless my natural lubrication were adequate. She should grip the skin on the shaft of my penis and slide it over the head of my penis. I would not want her to just slide her hand over my shaft and rub it, as that can be irritating unless there was ample lubrication. I have enjoyed masturbation for years and have had years of wonderful foreplay before intercourse with my wife, but she has never masturbated me — yet — maybe soon!
- age 63, Florida
I usually don't say a lot when a boyfriend or girlfriend masturbates me. Otherwise, I could do it by myself. When someone else masturbates me it's a different technique each and every time. I like it when I learn new ways to masturbate. The only time I do say something is when the other person doesn't know how to do it. I just point out where to touch me, gentle or hard, fast or slow. I like it when the other person performs oral sex on me, but since I "squirt" a lot I don't get much oral sex.
- age 15, Germany (female)
I'd tell him or her to take their time — fingers on my clitoris and in my vagina, but nothing kinky. And if the person has a dildo, bring it on!
- age 38, California (female)
"Well, all right — I've wanted you to touch my penis, and here's how. Hold it in your hand, relax, and move up and down. You don't have to move your hand super fast to get my penis hard, just medium. Get used to the feeling of my erection, and let me and the penis show you when to go faster or slower. Guys like to fantasize about girls' bodies — maybe you could even let me see your breasts or touch them while you do it. Maybe I could even feel your wetness. I love it that you trust me this much. We also fantasize about having intercourse, so maybe you could put some lotion on my penis. I promise you it'll feel great to me. I know your hand isn't like a vagina; neither is mine. After I've been hard for a few minutes of stroking, I'll be ready to ejaculate, so let's have a tissue ready, okay?"
- age 51, Oregon
If I am not yet erect, they should run their fingers over my thighs and pubic region, closing in on but not touching my penis at first. Then they should touch start at my scrotum and work their way up. If it were a guy, I would ask him to use the same grip and stroke that he does for himself so I could mimic that on his penis. Then I would do the same so he could catch my rhythm as well. If I start dry, I usually end dry. Also, with my skin not so tight around the erection, I like a really firm "Fist" grip, especially when I ejaculate. When lubed I like a variety of different strokes and speeds. When I get overstimulated in one area, I like to shift the pressure from crown to upper shaft to lower shaft to scrotum to perineum, etc.
- age 17, New Jersey
First, I would tell you to start by rubbing my clitoris slowly because it is sensitive. As my clitoris swells, I like you to tease me. Rub it slowly, stop, and then rub it slowly again. I also like to have you blow on it (with cool air), and then have a hot tongue put pressure on it. I have a small vibrator that has four bumps on the head and turns in a circular motion. As my excitement builds, that will give extreme stimulation to my clitoris. This is normally a finishing move and brings me to orgasm.
- age 31, Pennsylvania (female)
The main points would be to start out slowly and tease me. In other words, don't just grab and rub, but massage around my penis, testicles, pubic hair, thighs, etc. As I begin to react to the great feelings that are building up (you will hear and see my response), wrap your hand around my penis and rub up and down slowly. To add more buildup, you can stop rubbing and go back to massaging around my pubic area. Continue this until I tell you I am ready (almost forever or until you hand gets tired) — then finish me my rubbing my penis up and down fast. You will enjoy the results of your hard work.
- age 45, Ohio
First, massage my penis through my underwear, and then take it out. Cup my scrotum and testicles gently, and lightly grip the shaft. With your thumb, massage my head through the foreskin and then pull it back. Stroke slowly and gently at first, then faster and harder later, alternating between the two. Apply spit or lube to the head of my penis, and then twist it rhythmically with your whole fist, using your wrist. Use your free hand to massage the rest of my body — chest, nipples, stomach, thighs, scrotum and testicles, perineum, etc. When I'm about to climax, grip the shaft tightly, speed up your strokes, and don't stop or slow down until I tell you to.
- age 17, South Africa
I enjoy it most when a man inserts a small vibrator into my vagina and just leaves it there while stimulating my nipples and clitoris with his fingers. It feels best when he starts out slow in both areas and gradually increases pressure and speed. The more pressure applied to the nipples (gradually), the better!
- age 25, Idaho (female)
Start slow and then increase to a speed you can maintain easily throughout the masturbation session. Stimulate my clitoris. That is mainly what makes girls have orgasms! Don't just use your tongue — use your hands, too. And also, keep the negative comments and thoughts to yourself. We're trying to enjoy this!
- age 16, North Carolina (female)
I would want them to lie down with me so we could do mutual masturbation — my leg under his/hers so I can have free access to all vital spots. Put some good lubricant on my scrotum and penis, and then use various strokes, pumping, and pressure to get me close. As we draw near to climax we tell each other to slow down. When we are both ready, we stroke to a mutual orgasm. Hot!
- age 54, California
Use the "Rosy Palm" method, and then play with my scrotum and testicles, and finger my anus at the same time. Go slow, then real fast, then real slow — kind of like teasing me.
- age 15, Michigan
I would kiss them first as a thank you, then I would ask them to go slow, letting me savor each stroke. As I got closer to climaxing, I would ask them to speed up and talk dirty to me. When I was done I would immediately offer to masturbate them.
- age 36, Florida
My clitoris is not my only sensitive part! When I masturbate I enjoy stimulating the area around my vagina. I touch my clitoris only when I'm really close to orgasm. My boyfriend still hasn't figured this out. Also, I don't like a lot of pressure, and slower is better.
- age 16, Indiana (female)
With me wearing my boxers, rub me through the material, starting slow and then getting faster and faster. At first, apply a gentle pressure but get more intense until I let you know the limit. Place one hand on my chest and hold me back as I push my body forward. To be honest, this just kind of happened one time without any instruction, planning, or expectation. It was the best orgasm I ever had with a partner.
- age 24, Pennsylvania
I usually don't say anything before being masturbated — I just let my girlfriend get on with it. Afterwards, I tell her how good it was, what she did that I liked, and what did not work as well. This "feedback loop" allows her masturbation technique to evolve with our relationship. Soon, she's doing it right and finding new ways to satisfy me.
- age 19, United Kingdom
When a guy masturbates me, I always tell him to pay special attention to my clitoris. Most guys think that just sticking their fingers in my vagina will get me to climax. With many women, including me, it's not true. Yes, it feels good; but while you're fingering a woman, you should also rub her clitoris (not too hard) until she's ready to climax. Then give it a little squeeze — that feels great.
- age 20, Washington (female)
I'd tell her to focus on all of my penis, to enjoy it, and not be afraid. The pressure should be neither loose nor hard (unless I tell her to change). As for speed, start off fast and then go slower. Also, she shouldn't forget my testicles and not just suck but take care of my penis — love it. She could go first if she wants; I know I also have a lot to learn from her (for when I do it to her).
- age 16, Puerto Rico
I prefer that the person stand behind me and put his or her right hand around my waist to grip my penis, simulating how I do it when I masturbate. If it's a guy, it's especially stimulating for me to feel his hard penis pushing between my legs while he's masturbating me. I also prefer four fingers around my shaft, mostly near the base, so his or her index finger brushes the bottom of my glans during the upstroke. As I approach a climax, I like the left hand to come around my waist and gently squeeze my testicles while pulling downwards. Then, it is best if the speed increases to about four strokes per second (or as fast as possible). This gives me a very intense climax, and I usually ejaculate much further than usual.
- age 22, California
I like it if the angle from which your finger touches me is the same angle as my own finger would be touching me. So I suggest that I sort of sit in your lap while you reach around me. Either you or I should hold my labia open so my clitoris isn't obstructed. You should rub slightly more to the right side of my clitoris, so as not to be directly on it, but at an angle. The pressure should be light but continuous — not like scratching an itch, but more like finger painting. Rub your finger in a circular motion at about 3 rotations per second. When I get closer to orgasm (I will tell you and my clitoris will become wetter and more tense), you should increase the pressure and speed. When I reach orgasm, continue more slowly and lightly for about one minute after my highest point. While all of this is going on, you should have one or two fingers inside my vagina. And, once I climax, leave your fingers there for a few minutes.
- age 17, Massachusetts (female)
The girl who is about to masturbate me should take a firm hold on my penis and rub furiously. I get so much more pleasure this way. I also get turned on if she does something with my semen when it comes — like eat it in front of me. I would also like it if she were to undress so I can touch her genital area as well. This would also give her this unique feeling of pleasure.
- age 14, Scotland