habit

I grew up in the bush in Australia. We lived in a scattered community. The one-teacher school, with a couple of dozen kids, was in a village a couple of miles away, so we had to walk to and from school though the bush. I was 7 years old and in 3rd grade, but we all played together with boys in the upper grades. One afternoon I set off to walk home after school and was joined by three 9- and 10-year-olds. They told me that they wanted to show me something. We stopped at a picnic spot on the edge of the bush.

Sex for me began innocently enough. Starting at age 12, I enjoyed lying on my bed in pajamas, on my belly, rocking forward and back, because it made my penis feel good. If I did that long enough, for just a moment I would feel very good all over my body, like I was flying, and there'd be a little "jump" deep inside me. I had never heard of masturbation, didn't suppose that any observer would guess that my penis was being stimulated, and did it openly, whenever I wanted, even if other family members were present.

I grew up in a Southern family that was extremely religious. We never talked about sex, alcohol, or bodily functions. Our home was almost puritanical; I never saw my dad or brothers naked. I'm sure that my mother was actually afraid of sex; my dad never spoke of it, although I think he had a very strong libido, so he was probably hugely frustrated most of the time. (In mid-life he left my mother to have a torrid affair with another woman.) I began to have sexual fantasies around age 10, although I didn't realize that's what they were.

Like many who've taken the time to join this amazing and awe-inspiring site, I have been a life-long masturbator. In fact, I cannot remember a time I haven't masturbated. Call it luck-of-the-draw, coincidence, or the best discovery of my life, but I found out how to pleasure myself before I can even remember my memories. For some reason I knew that it was best done in private, so I can't recall ever being scolded or diverted by my parents. I also don't remember them ever discussing it with me, which is just as well I suppose.

I don't remember when I didn't fondle my penis. I still do, every chance I get. My first memory is of sitting in my highchair at the dining-room table with no pants on, fondling my penis. Apparently, I had wet all my pants and they were in the washer. My father was yelling at me to "Stop that." I had no idea what he was talking about, so I kept right on fondling myself. He then said that if I didn't stop, he would throw his water at me. I didn't stop, since I didn't know what he was talking about, so he threw his water at me.

I thank JackinWorld for being an integral part of my masturbation life — there from the very beginning. I first masturbated to orgasm 6 years ago. As puberty was just starting, I found myself browsing the Internet searching for whatever information I could come across. At some site, somewhere, I found a link to JackinWorld. I was intrigued and diligently read the JackinHow-To section. I went downstairs to my room (by now everybody was asleep), stripped naked, and lay on my bed. I tried to follow the directions, pulling the skin on my penis back and forth.

I've masturbated for as long as I can remember. For all I know, I may have been busy masturbating when I was born. Of course, my technique when I was young wasn't very sophisticated. I'd lie on my front, I'd use my right hand to clamp my flaccid penis against my right leg, and I'd cup my left hand over my scrotum, which I held to my left. Then, I'd wiggle my groin. I masturbated like this at least once a day, and I think my penis may have been my favorite plaything. It certainly is the only plaything I still play with 30 some years later!

I started noticing differences between boys and girls' bodies in nursery school. The boys and girls didn't have separate restrooms; I thought that girls had to urinate sitting down because their penises weren't fully developed like boys (of course we urinated standing).

I was never very conscious of erections, and at first, they were a pain — a needless, useless wonder. I'd get one, and if I noticed, I'd tap it to try to rid of it. At sleepovers when I was very young, friends would ask what they were. I had no idea, and told them so. This continued until I was about 10, at which point I decided (or was told) that erections were something to be hidden and covered up. Ironically, it was this decision/command that piqued my curiosity.

I began to masturbate at about age 11, mainly due to curiosity about my body that a number of guys have when they start wanking. I was sitting in bed and noticed that my penis had gone stiff. I began to rub it with the "fist" method, and a little later I had this intense feeling, my first orgasm. I rushed to the bathroom, thinking I needed to pee quite badly. I thought all these feelings I had were odd, and didn't think about what I had done for a week or two. At about this time, my friends had been joking about wanking, and I had no real idea what they were talking about.