As I've gotten older, I've learned that reaching an orgasm quickly isn't nearly as important as the process of getting there. So, again, quality is far better than quantity. Now, I use a number of techniques that allow me to get just to the brink and then I stop. Many of the techniques I have used to achieve this are ones that I have read about at this site. I've gotten so good at a lot of these techniques that I can get *so* close to the brink, actually partially ejaculate, and still not go over the edge. I have been able to Stop & Go literally dozens of times before I finally cannot take it any more and I finish. As most of us know, the more you Stop & Go, the more potent the orgasm, and the quantity of semen borders on disturbing.
- age 35, Indiana
This Week's Wackiest Response:
If I even accidentally touch my penis, I have an orgasm. To speed things up, I might intentionally touch my penis.
- age 15, Illinois
I've pretty much got this down to a fine art and my orgasms never take me by surprise. By varying my speed and grip, and sometimes stopping altogether, I can hold off my orgasm for as long as I like. I know the feelings well enough that I can always tell when to back off, and how close to the edge I can go. I take advantage of this by bringing myself as close to an orgasm as I can get without having one and then holding there, just enjoying that intense pre-orgasm feeling.
- age 20, Australia
I have quite a bit of control over my orgasm and ejaculation, especially when I masturbate with a genital ring and a condom. I don't do this every time I masturbate, but on a special occasion when I know I can take my time and enjoy myself, these two "masturbation aids" help considerably. Also I find that doing Kegels for Men, as I read on this site, helps out a lot. Also, my girlfriend likes that I can hold off my ejaculation until I please her more; then she "lets me ejaculate."
- age 16, Ontario, Canada
I have complete control of my orgasm during my masturbation sessions; only time and motivation are limiting factors. If I wish to slow my orgasm, I decrease the speed and pressure of my stroke. Conversely, if I wish to hasten my orgasm, I simply increase both of those factors. When engaged in a prolonged session, I often stop stroking completely and allow my penis to soften before returning to what I was doing.
- age 63, Michigan
When I approach an orgasm, I sometimes lose it. I can usually control it, but it depends on how long it's been since the last time I masturbated. To slow down an orgasm, I stop stroking and think of something else.
- age 16, Indiana
I have almost total control over how long a masturbation session lasts. It's one of the reasons that I have learned to enjoy masturbation more than partner sex. I customarily make each session last at least an hour or two, sometimes longer, depending on how much time I have available. I have been masturbating every day (usually more than once) for about 57 years, which is how I have developed that much control. I have always masturbated that much whether I was single or married, with a girlfriend, or between partners – it never changes much. Masturbation has always been my sexual home base and for the past 30 years it has been entirely by my choice.
- age 69, California
I think I have total control over when I have an orgasm when I masturbate. If I want it to be quick, I stroke a lot faster; if I want the session to last, I use the Stop & Go method. I definitely prefer to take my time – the longer the session, the better the ending.
- age 18, New Jersey
When I was a teenager, I had little control (and didn't want any) over how quickly I climaxed. In more mature years, I found I had considerable control based on how fast I stroked, what I visualized, and whether I used lubricant (I am circumcised). Of course, the length of time since my last orgasm makes a difference, too.
- age 80, Texas
I have plenty control over when I reach orgasm during my masturbation sessions. To reach orgasm faster, I rub the head of my penis faster and focus just on that area. To slow it down, I use only two fingers to rub or I use the Stop & Go method. Either way, the orgasms are amazing.
- age 16, New Jersey
Initially in a session, I have a lot of control over my orgasm, as I'm nowhere close. As I get more aroused, I can tell that I'm getting closer. I can hold off my orgasm for quite some time, but I have to be very careful, even going so far as to stop touching anywhere on my body. If I want the session to last longer than usual, I will often stop touching my clitoris entirely, as that will set off an orgasm instantly if I'm really close. After a while of teasing, I usually climax somewhat involuntarily, as I will try to stop, but can't.
- age 29, California (female)
I have almost no control – when I get turned on, I get *really* horny. There's no middle ground for me. Once I start stroking I can't stop and can't even control the noises I make. (My brother, who's a year older and shares my bedroom, makes fun of me. He says I sound like I'm trying to lift something heavy.) My body wants to go straight to orgasm, so I make all my muscles tense in rhythm and move my pelvis around. I've tried the Stop & Go technique, but whenever I try to stop, I feel like I'm going to explode with horniness. So I go!
- age 13, Massachusetts
I am a premature ejaculator, unfortunately. Although with the initial stroking process, it takes a good minute or so to get me into "the mode," I feel from there on in that I if I were to do 4 to 8 more strokes, I would climax without any trouble. So, I find that the best thing for me to do is to take two or three strokes, back off for about around 30 seconds, and then continue with another two or three strokes, especially when I feel quite close to ejaculation, I clench my PC muscles tightly, which seems to help somewhat. I usually go with that process for an additional 10 minutes, and (lately, now that I'm trying the Stop & Go method) my orgasms have been sinfully pleasing and more explosive than before. For the first time, I'm shooting – hard. I'm usually a dribbler, so that's a big accomplishment for me. My goal is to be able to hold orgasm off longer, without backing off the stroking.
- age 22, Connecticut
It depends on the mood I am in when I masturbate, but occasionally, I can make my orgasm last longer than normal and that sensation is so amazing. All I do is just contract right before ejaculation, holding it for as long as possible, then when it finally happens, it lasts for around five seconds longer. This is *so* amazing! Usually, it shoots a little further; although, it hasn't happened for a while.
- age 16, Canada
I suppose that there are two parts to control, mental and physical. To slow down physically, I just decrease the pressure and speed of stroking. Mental self-control is something else. Sometimes after a long session I cannot exert the physical control but have to drive to orgasm.
- age 58, Arizona
I have absolutely no control over my penis. It is like my master. If it wants to have an orgasm at a particular moment, there is nothing I can do to stop it. It tells me to ejaculate, and so I do. There's no holding back the master.
- age 18, Taiwan
I like to masturbate while reading gay erotic stories on the Internet (I'm not gay, but those are the stories that turn me on the most for some strange reason), and my best orgasms come when I can time mine to that of the main character in the story I'm reading. I like to do it slowly and gently to build up my arousal to the point where I'm close, then slow down even more and grip more lightly to keep from ejaculating. I find I can bring myself to the edge and back off easily most of the time. Sometimes I have to stop completely to keep from going over the edge, and if it is a really good story, such as when there is more than one action scene, sometimes I can't control myself and ejaculate early. But most of the time I can time it so that just as the main character starts to spasm, I do too, and I start ejaculating just after he does. As I come down off my high, I'll re-read the orgasm scene as I milk the last of the feeling and semen out of my penis, and that completes my satisfaction. Then it's cleanup time!
- age 16, West Virginia
I have pretty much total control over my orgasms. I can get off in just a few minutes if I really focus on it or I can take much longer and last upwards of a half-hour with complete relaxation. Most of the time, I go for about five or ten minutes because that is enough time to build myself to a very complete and satisfying orgasm. Also, after about ten minutes, I don't get much more from masturbating, so it's almost a waste of time to put off my orgasm. In terms of speeding up or slowing down my approach, I may try somewhat to lose my mental focus to slow it down or use my body more as if I was with someone to speed it up. Either way, my orgasms are all about the same – just wonderful!
- age 19, Arizona (female)
I find that how much control I have over when I reach orgasm depends on how long it has been since I last masturbated. If I have not masturbated for a few days then I have less control, most likely due to the fact that after a few days I am ready for a good orgasm!
- age 20, Missouri
I have pretty good control when reaching an orgasm. If I feel that I'm getting to that point and I want to reach it, I stroke more quickly. But if I want the session to last longer, I either slow my stroking or refrain from it and focus on other sensitive areas. I don't like to lose my erection or lessen my arousal. When I slow my approach to orgasm, I like to try to stay at a plateau for a while and then climb again. I continue doing that until I just can't take it any more. Then, I stroke faster and faster until I reach orgasm. Having a quick session can be nice, but an orgasm is always better if the session is long.
- age 24, Michigan
I can do it so that I stop just after the point of no return and after I've ejaculated, I feel like I want to do it again. I can keep this up for 5 ejaculations in a row.
- age 15, United Kingdom
I actually enjoy masturbating more when I don't have any control over my orgasms. I love to let the incredible sensations take control and make me moan and scream and my body convulse. When I was in college, my roommates used to tease me by saying, "Hey, you woke me up last night!"
- age 44, California (female)
No matter what I do, my session is quick. The longest session I've ever had lasted around 6 minutes, but it's good in a way, because I can do it quickly and not worry about being caught.
- age 15, New York
None at all – when the time comes, that's it and it flies!
- age 38, Rhode Island
When I'm masturbating my boyfriend, he has almost no control over reaching an orgasm because I am in charge. If I want him to climax more quickly, I speed up my stroking and focus on the head of his penis rather than the shaft. If I want it to take longer, I slow the rhythm and intensity of the stroking. My boyfriend says he achieves better orgasms this way.
- age 17, Canada (female)
When I masturbate, I use mental imagery of myself with a girl. Usually when I'm engaged in foreplay or I'm kissing the girl and we are not engaged in intercourse (in my mental imagery) I can't reach orgasm. Even when she is playing with me or engaging my little guy orally, I don't reach orgasm. Only when I imagine that I'm inside of her and thrusting in and out of her do I reach orgasm. I can prolong or speed up the orgasm by just changing the picture in my mind. Sometimes to prolong the pleasure, I'll pull out of her and imagine myself doing something else with her.
- age 24, Idaho
It depends on the type of session. Let's assume that I haven't done it in a while, as these situations tend to make me the horniest and result in the best orgasm. I have a little control, like whether I use the normal "fist" technique, or something I created. I do a lot of what could be called foreplay with myself; after all it's a part of sex and masturbation is merely sex with yourself. I have to concentrate to get it to move faster; so I can't be thinking about anything else, unless it's that someone would walk in on me and I would ejaculate, as they are, like, 10 feet away – Murphy's law, I guess. To slow it down, I usually have to go for my stimulation that isn't related to pumping, like caressing the glans with my fingers, it feels nice, but doesn't lead me to orgasm quickly. Control isn't something that I like to associate with masturbation, isn't the act one of not being in control, of being overwhelmed by the power in your loins?
- age 15, Florida
It is all in the breathing. I can control my orgasm through my breaths.
- age 22, New York
It may be due to my age, but nowadays I don't find any need to slow down the approach of orgasm because it takes me a lot longer for me to reach orgasm than when I was younger. Often I'm ready for an orgasm sooner than my penis is, but if I try to force it too early, I end up not only failing to have one, but also losing my erection in the process. Whenever I feel that I'm ready to climax, I can usually bring myself the rest of the way to orgasm by speeding up the strokes on my penis, which brings on the orgasm faster.
- age 47, Tennessee
When I was masturbating every day, I had a lot of control over how long it took to reach orgasm, but I've recently had a long hospitalization where I didn't masturbate for a whole month and since then have noticed a marked drop in libido. The recent two times I've masturbated (twice in a fortnight), I've reached orgasm very quickly (in a matter of minutes) and felt unable to prolong it. However, when I was "in practice," I found the advice on JackinWorld useful in slowing the approach to orgasm. Breathing control, particularly slowing it down and not breathing too deeply would often prolong the plateau phase. I also find the type of stroke important – when I want to climax, rapid and long strokes get me there quickly; and, stimulating the frenulum can be useful. On the other hand, stimulating my scrotum and sides of the glans, along with slower strokes, delay orgasm when I want to prolong the session. Posture can also influence things; I tend to climax most quickly while lying on my back (my favorite position).
- age 34, Australia
I have a lot of control over when I reach orgasm when masturbating, but not the willpower to exercise it.
- age 20, Australia (female)
In nine years of masturbating, I've discovered that by concentrating on my PC muscle (by actually not contracting it as I masturbate) I can desensitize my penis. This works best during my favorite type of masturbation session, humping the bed (it requires a condom if you don't want to make a mess). So as I hump the bed, I relax my PC muscle so I can continue pumping. When I'm ready for orgasm, I just pump away and contract my PC muscle, and soon it's ecstasy.
- age 17, Sweden
You've got to develop good control to be a husband, so mine has gotten pretty good over the years. In fact, I don't let myself have an orgasm without consciously deciding that it's time to let go and having something ready to ejaculate into. Normally, I can tell when I'm getting close and I just slow my stroking or thrusting, and enjoy the fantastic sensations of being about to go over the edge. If I need to speed up, I can always move my hand or my penis faster or have a very specific fantasy about the body warmth of my wife or some woman in my imagination. That usually takes care of it and has me ejaculating within seconds. However, my wife says she isn't interested in control and just goes over the edge as soon and as often as she can – lucky girl.
- age 46, Maryland
I love an extended session. I have found that the best way to do it is just before you ejaculate, to let go and let your body relax. You will ejaculate a little bit. Then wait about two minutes and do it all over again. I have done this before, like eight times in one session. It's tiring, but the orgasm is awesome.
- age 17, Virginia
When I was a kid and a rookie at America's real national pastime, my objective was to get to climax as fast as I could, but I learned the pleasures of self-control early one morning when, at 15 or 16, I watched my dad masturbate from start to finish. (We were on side-by-side cots in a fishing cabin, about 5 feet apart and since I was a notoriously late sleeper, he must have thought I was dead to the world.) His session lasted for more than a half-hour; he played with his penis till he was erect, and then went into a Stop & Go routine. He stroked slowly for a while, then lay still for a while more, just holding his shaft around the base and tickling his glans lightly with two fingers. Only at the end did he step up the tempo and let the jets of semen fly onto his belly and chest. The scene made me hot, and as soon as he padded off to the bathroom to clean up, I masturbated into my underpants as fast as I could. But that was practically the last time I went for speed. I borrowed all my dad's techniques for stretching out the pleasure and they've made a good thing better for me ever since.
- age 46, Iowa
I have complete control over it. To speed it up I rub faster; to slow it down, slower. And to make the orgasm more powerful, I alternate between vaginal and clitoral stimulation.
- age 20, Connecticut (female)
When I first began masturbating as a 13-year-old, there was no control; I simply had a huge orgasm and it was all over. This was the same through my early twenties. Now in my early thirties, I have learned to have a "slow" orgasm when masturbating. I slow down my stroking rhythm towards the end and "hover" at the point of orgasm. Also letting a small amount of semen seep out is possible and helps, but needs a lot of control and self-discipline. In this way I can have several small orgasms and a lot of fun, but it's not easy when you are very young. For me, the best is to let out one or two drops of semen and then blank my mind completely to what I am doing. The orgasm fades away and you can then stroke and ejaculate again – as many as three times in my experience.
- age 33, South Africa
I used to just go at it and ejaculate as fast as I could because I was impatient for the great release of orgasm. But when my best friend and I had sleepovers when we were 13, he did it for a long time – so long that I sometimes would fall asleep waiting for him to finish. It was a real turn-on to masturbate together, but after I was finished, it wasn't a turn-on for him to do it alone; it was almost irritating, and a little embarrassing to watch. I used to think it was because he had a hard time reaching orgasm, but one day he got frustrated with me for getting done so fast, and said I was missing the best part, that the buildup leading to orgasm could be as good or better than the orgasm itself if I took it slowly and "edged." He decided to show me, did it to me for nearly an hour, and had me on such an edge of pleasure that I couldn't stand it any more, until had the biggest and best orgasm of my life – a really messy one, too. I asked him how he'd learned that, and he said his brother had taught him a couple of years before. He made me promise I'd practice self-control, and I did. Sometimes I could hold off for an hour and sometimes I lost it earlier, but in any case, my masturbation felt better than ever.
- age 16, Pennsylvania
Yes, by slowing down or stopping for a while, either when I am about to reach orgasm or before, I can postpone it. However, more often than not, I lack the willpower to do this, and just continue masturbating until I reach orgasm. For some reason, during sexual intercourse I can control myself much better.
- age 38, Bolivia
When I masturbate myself, it can last pretty much as long as I want. However, when my girlfriend masturbates me, sometimes it takes about 30 seconds, while at other times, it takes infinitely longer.
- age 15, United Kingdom
Sometimes for no apparent reason, as I'm approaching the edge of orgasm and then holding back, my semen just lets go and flows thickly and steadily out of me. Once it starts, I can do nothing to stop it; it just flows. But at that point, I haven't had the thrilling feeling or the contractions that go with ejaculating. I can still have an orgasm by continuing to masturbate, and I really enjoy having my warm slippery semen coating my penis while I keep thrusting and have my orgasm. It must just be that the muscle that holds back my semen gets tired and lets it sneak past. This doesn't happen often, but enough that I recognize it as sort of normal.
- age 49, New York