I think having one for each hand would be great!
- age 18, Montana
This Week's Wackiest Response:
Any penis will do. Let this be a reminder for you kiddies out there: Never masturbate with scissors! I learned that the hard way.
- age 14, New Zealand
I think any penis that works is "the perfect penis." Oh yeah, some debating points can be made for shorter or longer, but if it satisfies the individual and his partner, I think playing the "if only" or "what if" game is self-defeating. Besides, I have read — and definitely pray never to have to find out personally — that men can be great lovers even without having a functional penis at all.
- age 64, Virginia
The perfect penis for masturbation would be big, long, and circumcised. When it ejaculates, the sperm should shoot out high and far.
- age 14, Canada
I think mine is ideal. Its average size fits my hand well, without being too short to hold, yet short enough to control well. As for another person's, I guess it would matter more who it was connected to. I would want them to be open and tell me what they want and how it feels. This would make for a nice bonding experience; otherwise, it could lead to awkwardness.
- age 22, Alabama
The perfect penis is one without disfiguring veins sticking out. It would have the same color as the rest of its body. Even when it's hard, it would still be soft enough for a good squeeze. I think the perfect penis is about 7 inches (18 cm.) long and thick enough that my fingers would just touch my thumb in the fist position. That would be a mighty fine penis.
- age 18, Illinois
The perfect penis would masturbate itself!
- age 14, Michigan
I'd like some kind of auto-lubrication, so there would be no need to buy oils, creams, and such. And, I could control it, so that I wouldn't mess up my underwear just by getting excited.
- age 18, Rhode Island
I'd like it to be about 5 or 6 inches (13-15 cm.) in length, and intact with a long, thick, and fully retractable foreskin. It would have an average girth, be reasonably straight, pinkish white, and smooth, not beat-up looking. There would be a small amount of soft, blond, short pubic hair. The scrotum would be smooth.
- age 58, California
I am uncircumcised and I think this is important because it makes masturbation more enjoyable. I think everybody's penis is perfect and would never criticize or make fun of anyone else's. I have a slightly small penis and guess it would be better if it were more adult-size, only because I would feel more comfortable masturbating with other boys my age.
- age 13, Arkansas
Although I haven't seen hundreds of penises, I have seen my share. The features that I love most are that it gets hard as a rock and the foreskin is wonderful to play with and look at, too. A very smooth head that is evenly colored a purple-burgundy is beautiful, and lots of soft, furry pubic hair. I find a shaved scrotum very attractive, too, especially the underside. Length and width aren't that important, but if we were going for ideal here, I'd say about 6 1/2 inches long (16.5 cm) and a nice, even thickness from base to tip. Lots of "pre-cum" is a must, too. And I prefer a forceful ejaculation with several spurts and a full body-shudder from my partner when I masturbate him.
- age 28, Canada (female)
The perfect penis would be one that has never been masturbated before. A smooth, hairless, long penis that is very sensitive.
- age 16, Texas
For me, the perfect penis is quite average, just like mine (18 cm/7 inches). It is wide enough to fit nicely in my fist. Although I'm not circumcised, I can still pull my foreskin all the way back. That way, I can choose to masturbate either by moving my foreskin over my glans (thus needing no lube), or to lube up and stimulate my glans directly. I have masturbated for 22 years using the "fist" method of moving my foreskin. But lately, I got myself some lube and found a whole new way of masturbating. It's great to have the choice!
- age 34, Netherlands
I'd like a penis that is between 6 and 7 inches (15-18 cm) long, and thick. Also, it should not be crooked or bent too much. Mine is a bit "sideways," and it annoys me whenever I look at it. That is more of a turn-off. Also, I would have a scrotum that is neither too long nor too short. It wouldn't be just something hanging down behind my penis, but rather something that is part of it.
- age 14, South Carolina
A foreskin is essential to the ideal penis, because masturbation can then be done at any time and without extra lubrication. Besides, the foreskin has its own sensitivity; if I masturbate with my foreskin pulled down so that my penis looks as if it is circumcised, the orgasm intensity is much lower than when I use the foreskin as a kind of artificial vagina. I also ejaculate a much greater volume of semen when I masturbate by rubbing my foreskin. That volume is even greater when my girlfriend does it for me as I stimulate her clitoris and vagina.
- age 27, Spain
Any penis is a good penis!
- age 16, Canada
The perfect penis would be long enough so that I could suck it. I think that would be really cool.
- age 24, Georgia
I would like my penis to be quite long, but of a small diameter, and uncircumcised. When limp, it would hang down beautifully in a curve between my legs. When I am masturbating, it would be so erect that it points toward the ceiling. The foreskin would be large enough to slide over the head.
- age 13, Norway
The perfect penis is smooth. The pubic hair is just a tight bush at the base. It's about 7 inches (18 cm) long, and just slightly curved, pointing upwards. And preferably, it's my own.
- age 15, Sweden
The perfect penis for masturbating would be circumcised, between 7 and 9 inches long (18-23 cm), and be somewhat thicker than average. Having a velvet-soft head would be nice, too. Even if this weren't my own, I'd still love to masturbate it.
- age 40, California
The perfect penis would have to be uncircumcised so you didn't need lube. It would be between 6 and 7 inches long (15-18 cm), so you could use both hands on it. And it would curve just slightly to match your grip. Hey, my penis meets all of those qualifications! That gives me an idea!
- age 14, Iowa
The perfect penis is one that starts out soft so I can watch and feel it get hard as I play with it — and that when it does get hard, feels thick and throbbing in my hand.
- age 25, California (female)
I don't think there is a best or a worst penis. I like them all. My friends have a variety from white to black, big to small, hairy to shaven, and I love touching and feeling them all. It doesn't matter that we are different, because if we were all the same, it wouldn't be as much fun to masturbate each other. I like every penis!
- age 15, Canada
Medium-length foreskin, which still covers the head when the penis is stiff, because pulling it back is exciting. A reasonably large penis when flaccid, big enough to be worth showing off, but not grotesquely long or fat when fully erect. "Pre-cum" should seep out readily when I get excited. Pubic hair should not be shaved. The erect penis should stand at a high angle, so that it almost touches my belly button.
- age 22, United Kingdom
Unlike everyone else in my class, I am "lucky" to have a large penis already, even when compared to an adult's. I have only been masturbating for a few months, so I have never known what it is like to masturbate with a small penis. Having watched a few of my friends masturbate to orgasm with just one hand covering the whole of their penis (I always have to use both hands), I think I'd much rather have a small but shapely penis rather than the very long one that I have already developed.
- age 13, Ireland
The perfect penis would be one that would masturbate itself while you sit back and enjoy it.
- age 19, Pennsylvania
The perfect penis would let you stay squirming on the edge for as long as you want and would be long enough that you to suck on it yourself.
- age 16, Canada
The perfect penis would give tons of orgasms in one session, and would always want more afterward. It would be a perfect size so you can get a firm, comfortable grip. Also, it would feel comfortable when you masturbate dry. And last, the perfect penis would blow tons and tons of goo!
- age 15, Massachusetts
The ideal penis would be medium length, with a "mushroom" head, long foreskin, and a large scrotum to play with. For me, it's really all about the feeling that comes from the foreskin. I don't know how cut guys do it!
- age 20, Canada
I'm happy with my penile length and with being uncircumcised, but it would be better if my penis were a bit straighter and would stay erect even when my mind drifts, as it sometimes does when I masturbate. Also, I'd like it if no semen came out when I ejaculate, but the feeling would stay the same. I hate to clean up after masturbation. This would also be very useful for sex, as there would be no danger of pregnancy or HIV transmission. Of course, if for any reason I wanted to ejaculate semen, I'd have some way to switch the flow back on easily.
- age 15, United Kingdom