The here and now

Since I am in my early 80s my masturbation history, while long and eventful, is to my profound regret no more.

Early masturbation was with a group of neighborhood kids 9 to 11 years old, out behind a garage or in a drainage ditch at night where there wasn't a street light. It consisted mostly of playing with our own or each others' penises, with no orgasms. We thought it was fun and that it felt good. The lightest thing in the world is the penis. It rises on thought. There was some oral sex every once in a while, and there was much comparison of penis and testicle sizes. We did not do sleepovers in those days. I suppose we were worried about being "caught," but we kept a sharp lookout and were not discovered (that we knew of). We did not have much sense of guilt about it.

At age 12 or 13 I joined the Boy Scouts, and although there was probably a good bit of individual masturbation, there was never any group masturbation on weekend campouts or summer camp to my knowledge. However, there was an Area Councilman who took an interest in me and eventually got me to spend the night at his house. He masturbated me to my first orgasm. This same thing happened 4 or 5 times, but then I stopped it.

In my teens, as I recall, I masturbated 2 to 3 times a week with only an occasional group event and not much mutual masturbation. I recall once masturbating with a piano player traveling with a touring orchestra and a few times masturbating with a movie-theater employee while watching Tom Mix or William S. Hart. My friends and I never did go for multiple orgasms in one day, to my recollection. Masturbation was more of a private thing then and in high school.

After high school I worked for a construction company that had projects away from my home town. My coworkers were considerably older than I was and I usually had roommates, so not much privacy was available, but I seemed to manage. There was some great sex with girls, but not often, since we worked hard 48 to 56 hours a week on each project, and there was not much time to cultivate relations with the opposite sex.

Then I had an industrial accident — a fall that resulted in head, back, and foot injuries and hospitalization for nearly 3 months. I was on crutches for 1 ½ years. For most of that time I could not get an erection, but I still had the desire. I finally got to where I could orgasm even with only a partial erection — oh happy day! I went to work for a company that had a house/office/warehouse in a city away from my hometown. I had the place to myself most nights and weekends. I will never forget my first fullblown erection and sex with a girl — I was a man again. Even with my share of sex, I still masturbated a couple of times a week on weekend fishing trips with a girl friend — fun, fun, fun.

But then came World War II, Draft Registration before Pearl Harbor, a low draft number, the draft physical (a big room with 250 naked men), classification 1B, normal life and work and masturbation. Then a recall for another draft physical, lots more naked men, classification 1A this time, and a pitch for the Aviation Cadets. I tried, passed with flying colors, was sworn in, and then furloughed for 6 months before being called up to Kelly Field. I flunked the final physical and was designated GDO (Ground Duty Only), which involved technical schools and Stateside duty only. Talk about lack of privacy — my upper-bunk friend was bound to have felt the vibrations of that double bunk. I recall his slamming his meat against a post in frustration. I also recall a cadet bragging about a "wet-dream" he had in spite of the "softpeter" (saltpeter) everyone said the Air Corps fed us. There were numerous schools and assignment to what turned out to be a permanent station.

Living in a barracks I often wondered how much masturbation was going on in the other bunks — I knew what was going on in mine. We we had monthly "shortarm inspections" in the middle of the night with us still in our bunks. This beat the heck out of falling out in raincoats and overshoes to march to a medical room. I seniored to a room in the barracks where my privacy was assured. There was occasional sex with women, but not much mutual masturbation.

Then came victory, the GI Bill, a college degree (thank goodness), a fraternity, not much privacy but lots of "stone aches" and masturbation after dates. My roommate noticed and told a few others, which plagued me for a long time, but no bother. I took the attitude that they had to be doing the same thing. There was considerable mutual masturbation with the opposite sex, which was lots of fun. The pill was not available then. Then came graduation, a good job, and lots of girls who wanted to get married, but that wasn't for me. Finally I found one I thought suited me — how wrong I was. Then I found one that really did suit me, and there was good sex. 

Sex is wasted on the young, but masturbation is for the here and now. And I do mean now. I now have a son and daughter and 3 grandchildren for whom I have built up college accounts. My wife died of cancer 10 years ago, and my masturbation increased somewhat. There were lots of widows around who wanted companionship, but I have had no inclination to remarry — I have been married enough. Increasingly over the last 15 years my erections have softened, and more and more anal and prostate stimulation has been required. Now, however, I can no longer orgasm. Fondling myself is pleasant, but nothing happens. It seems all good things must indeed come to an end.