I was very young when I learned to masturbate, only 7 or 8 years old. As a young child I remember having frequent erections. I once got one at the doctor's office (in front of my mom!) when I had to pee into a cup for a kindergarten physical. How embarrassing. But erections felt good, and I liked to play with them when I was alone. I'd like to say my first orgasm was a memorable event, but it wasn't. At that age, it felt erotic to sleep with no underwear. I soon learned that rubbing my penis against the sheets felt especially good. Those sensations led to my first few orgasms, but they weren't impressive. Naturally I liked the feeling, so I did it night after night. A pastime was born.
I grew up in a very religious home. My parents never ever discussed sexuality, and there was certainly no "Birds and the Bees" talk at my house. Instead, I hid my masturbation from my parents and my older brother out of instinct. Touching myself felt really good, but it involved a "nasty" part of my body. I even remember counting how many times I had masturbated (hundreds by the time I was 10) and feeling guilty that I couldn't stop. One time I was mortified when my mom asked me why my underwear was balled up at the foot of my bed. Um, I dunno.
Readers should know how my story took a sad turn when I was about 9. Unfortunately I was a victim of, let's say, highly inappropriate sexual behavior (the perpetrator later went on to be a convicted sex offender). I felt deep down that I had done something wrong, or that people would discover what had happened to me. Regretfully, this experience gave me a negative outlook toward my body and sexuality for many years to come. I even wondered if it meant I was gay (which I'm not). I never told a soul about it for 18 years, and trust me, that's way too long to hold something inside.
So as I entered puberty, I masturbated often but reluctantly. I learned new techniques like the "fist" and humping a pillow. The first time I ejaculated, I was 12 and at Boy Scout camp. There was barely a drop of fluid that first time (and I had no idea what it was), but it felt pretty thrilling. I remember it started happening with each masturbation session, and before long, I had to anticipate the annoying little bit of sticky fluid at the end. In middle school, a so-called friend once accused another kid and me of masturbating. Somehow I thought he was on to my secret. It was many years later when I realized he was just insecure about himself (and that masturbation was normal). Still, my ambivalent feelings toward sexuality continued through high school, and I never had much confidence to date.
In 1996 I was a junior in college when I stumbled upon JackinWorld for the first time. I felt liberated at last. I read that practically everyone else masturbated *and* that I could discuss it openly. What a relief! I was proud that many of my self-taught techniques were there. My personal talent is producing a healthy supply of "pre-cum," which is like heaven on earth for us circumcised guys. Thank God for Cowper's glands! Only in the past couple years have I mastered being able to get a lot of it. Also, I've always wanted to know what it's like to experience the sensation of an intact foreskin. I'm studying to be a doctor now, and from time to time I have to assist a circumcision. The act of cutting off the little guy's foreskin makes me feel a bit guilty.
My own masturbation resumé is impressive: I've masturbated in planes, trains, and boats, and I've done it while lifeguarding, driving (not safe), and studying in the library — I still read JackinWorld from time to time just to remind myself that masturbation is natural, healthy, and an awesome way to enjoy one's body. As for frequency, my masturbation practices have peaked in my 20s as I've become more comfortable with my body. In high school and college I was a once-a-day man, probably because I felt so ashamed. Nowadays I can enjoy 3 or 4 sessions a day if the mood strikes. I'd like to say masturbation has helped my sex life, but due to my childhood events I've never felt prepared for a sexual relationship, so being a master masturbator has come in handy all these years. One day I look forward to being in a healthy sexual relationship (something I wasn't interested in until recently), and hopefully bringing up well-adjusted kids of my own.
I'm 28 now, and I'm about to finish my MD degree and begin training as a pediatrician (children's doctor). One of my career goals, like JackinWorld, is to facilitate open and non-judgmental communication with my patients and their parents. I feel we owe it to each other, and especially to our children, to be open about sexuality and human behavior. Burying our heads in the sand accomplishes nothing — I can speak from experience. So guys (and ladies), whether you're gay or straight, whether you masturbate alone or together, be safe, be respectful of one another, and celebrate your bodies. Cheers, everyone.
Do you find yourself masturbating more often during some seasons than others? Why?
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Impresive resumé
Gender:
Male