[This biography is by the same reader who wrote Shimmying up swing poles.]
I feel strange saying I began masturbating at age 11 between the 6th and 7th grades, but I read about other boys starting to "do IT" as early as age 8. Well, I did do something at that age, but couldn't identify "it" as sexual or something to be embarrassed about until I touched my penis one summer's night after the 6th grade. The discovery was awesome, but the approaches to "it" using the thumb above and the index finger below were scary. There was that quilt about the focus where I pee, and the knowledge that something very interesting (that must be wrong) was happening with the little twig as stiff as it had ever been. Interest in why it got "that way" brought only laughter about my being that way once and peeing straight into Mama's face as she was changing me. I knew it was only occasionally it got "that way," but I wanted Mama to tell me why. I was the continual why? guy.
Anyway, under the covers with my knees making a tent and my 'jammas pushed down, I worked on that tiniest of twigs and felt the rising and scary feelings that got to be worrisome but "neat." I passed by the feeling I identified with the 3rd grade and knew the feelings were sexual (and hence naughty)! Maybe 6 approaches to the summit of the ever-growing, scary feeling saw me get too scared on that first try-out of the experience. I did stop wiggling my weenie, and the feelings did subside (except for the "need" to feel that goodness again). The last one got away from me, however, and the letting-go didn't stop the rise that had a mind of its own and zoomed soaring off a precipice into dipping, pulsating flight from a cliff I was unaware of! I had been masturbating with the slimy help of the secretions of the Cowper's glands. I didn't ejaculate -- I was only 11.
I had broken a sound barrier and was in a thermal thicket of an irresistible "gotta-have-it" experience. The 7 attempts with one success were only "preliminaries" as I "broke in" that intensely tantalizing twig. I mutilated and mauled the poor thing into a bloody poor imitation of its former tiny self. The "going-back" was like verification I had really been there and had really soared in that cosmic flight of joyous gratification. I couldn't sleep, nor do I remember the instrument ever failing to stand up to the continual "abuse" all night long!
My behavior became furtive, and my mother knew something had changed. She scheduled a "pre-puberty" exam downtown with our pediatrician. The doctor pronounced me the worst case he had ever seen! That ended all communication with Mama, to whom I sent notes promising to be good. The last one just got a gruff, "as if you COULD!" She was extremely disappointed but unable to bring herself to tell me what I had found.
The neighborhood of boys was agog. We had all learned about "that FEELING" the same night and formed a "circle jerk" (or is it a jerk circle?). One guy was 12; so he soon began to get an oozing ejaculation. I waited 6 weeks.
I was interested in better communication, so I was dissatisfied with "that FEELING." I searched for lyrical or flamboyant phrases to describe orgasm, a term we'd never heard of. I also became the storyteller as we went on hikes to be out of earshot of others who might hear my fantasies that made pointed and panting poles in our pants. Girls and gearshift knobs was a fantasy the guys wanted repeated. Cars had three-on-the-floor in those days. Those were the days before hair grew there and when a sex thought brought on "BOING!"
The habit never has diminished to seldom. I was interrupted in the process in my early 60s by a girl high-school senior exchange student who was willing to talk about "back there." I admitted to her that my number of orgasms by the means she walked in on had reached into the 20,000s. She scolded me for telling her that but admitted she did "that too." I was her sponsor; so, nothing more intimate came of that joint discovery.
I'll end by just saying orgasm has been a rewarding joy all my life. JackinWorld and JackInsider are wonderful verifications I'm not alone.
