By M.J. Ecker
A JackinWorld reader recently sent in the following letter:
I've found a great way to intensify the masturbation experience: read erotic stories. I find I like them even better than pictures. When I don't find the kind of erotic stories I want, I make up my own. I take off my pants, lie on my bed, and write my stories in a notebook. I usually don't finish them because I get carried off in the fantasies and end up masturbating. But finishing a story is not important. It's putting yourself in the most horny state of mind you can achieve that heightens the experience.
Many guys just do a "snatch and pull" that's over in a few minutes. But masturbating is MENTAL, too. When I've spent a good 20 minutes mentally building the fantasy, I have the best (and most verbally loud) ejaculations ever. It's work, and most guys might not want to invest the time – but it's worth the trip. Try it!
This reader is absolutely right: masturbation is largely mental. Perhaps I never thought to address this in JackinWorld because it seemed obvious; I mean, I was writing stories and drawing pictures and coming up with elaborate fantasies as a teenager. But many of the letters we get are from people who complain their orgasms are weak, or their masturbation sessions aren't interesting or exciting or satisfying. That's where mental masturbation comes in!
It's been said your largest and most important sexual organ is your brain. What does that mean? Well, it means that your while your genitals are where you stimulate yourself to get sexual pleasure, they're only a small part of the complicated system that allows you to feel the pleasure, build it up, and let it explode with a good orgasm. Masturbating is kind of like riding in an elevator, with your penis (or clitoris) being like the button that causes the thing to go up. If you were at the bottom of a tall building and someone handed you just a button from an elevator, would that do you any good? Of course not! You need the elevator car, cables, and motor to lift you to the top. Likewise, if you had only a penis, you'd be a pretty sorry masturbator; you need your brain to really blast you off.
So how do you go about masturbating with your mind? Three simple words: get into it. Big time. Erotic stories or pictures can be great, but sometimes fantasy can be even better. And I'm not talking about just imagining yourself on top of some naked girl you think is hot. I mean really using your imagination creatively to the point where it almost seems like it's really happening. Close your eyes and visualize the whole scene, from beginning to end. Remember: The more detailed your fantasy, the more real it will seem, and the more erotic your session will be.
As an example, let's assume you're a guy fantasizing about being in bed with a girl (certainly a common enough fantasy). Here are some possible things you might consider while you build your fantasy:
1. Dialog. What are the two of you saying to each other before, going into, and during your intimate time together?
2. What does she look like? What would the two of you be wearing, and would you be taking off clothes as the scene progresses? Try to create the most vivid image you can; leave no details out of the picture.
3. What does her skin feel like? If she's wearing some sexy clothes, what do their textures feel like?
4. What sounds would she be making? What sounds would you be making? What would she be asking you to do, and how would she ask? What would you ask her to do? Again, you want this to be so vivid you practically hear her voice.
5. As much as you want to, try not to let your fantasy progress too fast. Tease yourself! In this example, for instance, pretend your imaginary lover doesn't want you to start intercourse right away but instead wants you to pleasure her for a while. What might that be like?
6. When you're very excited, raise the fantasy to the next step. Perhaps you're starting intercourse. What exactly would you be doing to her, and her to you? What positions would you be in? Again, what sounds and sights would you be experiencing?
You can also involve a few physical things in your session. If you have plenty of privacy, don't be embarrassed to vocalize a little, as this helps to enhance the mood. A little perfume can be erotic, or even certain tastes. Involve all of your senses! If you're imagining intercourse with you on top, thrust your hips as you masturbate. Turn on your stomach, hold your hand steady, and thrust your penis in and out of it. (This is [#56"] technique from JackinExpert Collection.) Remember, the more you can physically simulate what you'd actually like to be going on, the closer to reality it will seem.
One more thing: Slow down! Building a fantasy takes time. If you need to ejaculate quickly, that's one thing – but if you're going for the best possible experience with one of those killer, explosive orgasms, take lots of time. A session like this can easily last from a half-hour to an hour or even more. If you start to get that "hot" feeling down below and you want the experience to last – not to mention make the final orgasm even better – slow down, come to a complete stop, and rest for a bit. (This is the Stop & Go technique from JackinExpert Collection.) But that doesn't mean you have to turn off the fantasy; imagine you and your lover are resting.
I think you'll find that in addition to being really fun and erotic, these techniques will greatly improve your masturbation sessions and your orgasms. Have fun!