When I was at camp last summer, I shared a room with a roommate, so to masturbate, I sort of pushed the sheets up with one hand and masturbated with the other. That way, he couldn't see what was going on. It worked well — as far as I know, he didn't suspect a thing. He even started talking to me a few times while I was doing it!
- age 14, Pennsylvania
One time, I actually built up the courage to masturbate while my sister was asleep at the other end of the couch! All you do is use any outside noise to your advantage; a TV works great. Just turn it up slightly and jack SLOWLY! This also enhances the experience. I use the clock-radio next to my bed at night to do this, too.
- age 17, Canada
I had to share my older brother's bedroom and bed last month, because the roof and ceiling of my room was being fixed. At night, before we would fall asleep, the topic of girls and sex would always come up. He is a senior and had slept with 5 or 6 different girls so far, and he told me all about their sex together. When he would roll over to go to sleep, I would always still have an erection. So I'd roll over with my back to him and wait about 15 minutes until I thought it was safe. I would lie perfectly still and get the head of my penis out of the opening of my undershorts. I would take two fingers and my thumb and just move them around the head of my penis, sort of like opening a bottle with a twist-off cap. I would have a tissue ready under my pillow; I would put it over my penis at just the right time to catch all the juice. Then I would toss the tissue under the bed and flush it in the morning. I did this almost every night, and my brother never seemed to notice. This is not my favorite way to masturbate, but it's better than nothing when you really need it.
- age 14, Ohio
While slumming through Europe with a former student of mine, we saved money by doing a lot of camping in a 2-person tent. She told me before we left that she did not intend to have sex with me. There was so little privacy everywhere (particularly in the tent) that I knew I was going to have to masturbate somewhere or risk messing up my sleeping bag with a wet-dream. So I decided to use the "white athletic sock condom" technique while lying on my stomach. I waited until my travel partner was asleep, and then I went to it, trying hard to control my breathing and any noise I might make. I thought I was successful in keeping my little secret, but I learned later she knew what I was doing. In any case, I don't think she knew I was masturbating every night.
- age 49, New York
I was with my mom and dad and two brothers, and we were driving 20 miles to a town were I have piano lessons every Thursday night. The three brothers ride in the back and I was in the middle this one time. Well, I got a serious boner on the way home that night. I was really horny and masturbated with my whole family around me, and they never knew. Loose pants are great!
- age 14, Oregon
When I was a kid, my family used to go away on camping trips, which sometimes lasted two weeks. We had a 20-foot-long travel trailer, which my parents, my brothers, and I all slept in. I slept in an upper compartment 3 feet above my parents. The trick was to get my rocks off as intensely as I did in the privacy of my bedroom at home, but without making any noise or any mess. Plus there was the added thrill of trying to masturbate without getting caught! Looking back on it, the whole process taught me a lot about how taking my time can add tons to the whole experience.
- age 25, Maine
One time when I was in high school, I went to a sleepaway camp, and I really got the urge to masturbate one night. There were 12 of us all on bunk beds in this little cabin, all like 16 years old. I waited until I knew everyone was sleeping (especially the kid on the top bunk of my bed). Then I slipped my underpants down and slowly tried to get off. It was really kind of exciting knowing that at any moment someone might wake up and see me masturbating. Well, it took me about 10 minutes of slow, controlled stroking, and I ejaculated into my sleeping bag. I quietly cleaned up and then fell asleep. Nobody ever knew what I had done that night.
- age 22, Michigan
I have had many times when I needed to masturbate quietly, and it was difficult. I accomplished it by channeling all the noises I would make into the fantasy I was thinking about at the time.
- age 15, California
I masturbate in my "Nintendo" room while my parents are watching TV right in the next room, and the door is always open. Over the years I've developed a sense of direction as to where they are in the house, and as long as I don't make any noise, I don't get caught. It's a thrill!
- age 15, Pennsylvania
I have to masturbate quietly all the time. Because I'm not circumcised (thank God), I can do it with very little (if any) sound. I can masturbate almost anytime without having to worry about being caught — because of that piece of skin.
- age 16, Illinois
I don't care if I make noise — it's worth it. Masturbation rules. I love orgasms.
- age 17, New York
Sometimes when I go over to my brother's house (he is 23), I sleep over. We have bunk beds, and I sleep on the top. It's hard to masturbate, because the bed shakes VERY easily, and it will shake the bottom, too, if I go too hard. So I have to be quiet and easy. Sometimes it can take an hour to ejaculate!
- age 15, New Jersey
Unfortunately, I have to masturbate quietly most of the time. I just take deep, even, quiet breaths so no one can hear me.
- age 16, Texas
I had to do it a lot of different times under different circumstances. The most common is when I have a friend stay over. I sleep in my bed, and he sleeps on the floor next to me. When I start to masturbate, I try to get really hard first by rubbing through my underwear. Then, I grab just below my penis head and jerk it, without any lube (to keep it quiet). When I am about to ejaculate, I hold my breath to muffle any moans, and then I cough to release the built-up pressure and to muffle the noise my semen makes while my hand finishes off my orgasm.
- age 23, Wisconsin
I was in the room with my cousin; he was watching TV, and I had the urge to masturbate. The first thing I did was to get into my bed and pull the covers over me. I watched for my cousin's head to move, but it didn't. I slipped my hand down my pants and started feeling myself. Soon I got an erection, and I had to pull my pants down. I was so scared to masturbate because I thought my cousin might turn around and look, so I just rubbed the back of my penis with my fingers. Soon I started feeling so good I had to grab it and beat it. Shortly after, I ejaculated all over the bed and the sheets. I hated keeping my orgasm quiet — but I did, and my cousin never knew.
- age 17, Kentucky
When I was in college, I shared a dorm room with a friend, and I had the top bunk. Sometimes at night, I would wait for him to fall asleep, and I would masturbate as quietly as possible. I'm right-handed, but I like to masturbate with my left hand, palm down against the head and fingers wrapped around it. A good supply of spit makes for a nice feeling without too much noise. This technique allowed me to stroke without bouncing the bed.
- age 27, South Carolina
I was in my room thinking about my girlfriend, and I decided to please myself — but my little sister was in the next room, so I had to be very quiet. I made sure I was quiet by controlling my movement, but I did have a problem controlling my breathing. When I ejaculated after a couple of minutes, I moaned and thought for sure she heard — but I lucked out. I've been masturbating with my sister next door ever since.
- age 15, Colorado
When I was 12 or 13, I masturbated in the back of our car while my father was driving me to my aunt's house for the holidays. I sat down behind him so he couldn't see my hands. I put a lot of spit on my thumb, put my hand down my pants (without opening them), and then rubbed my thumb in circles over my penis. It took a lot longer than normal to get where I wanted to be, but it was worth it. The kick of my father being there, and the fact that I wanted to ejaculate but it was taking so long, made it a very interesting experience.
- age 21, Belgium
My high school lacrosse team was partying late after our last match of the season. At about 2 a.m, I had to leave for home, and an older teammate dropped me off. We talked for a few minutes before I got out of his car, and he asked me if I wanted him to lend me some good videos to masturbate with. I said yes. He opened the glove compartment and he handed me a tape in a black plastic case. I had seen the typical skin mags, and even the Playboy channel, but never anything hardcore. I was anxious to see it right away, but my mom was still up reading and watching TV in the game room, which is our family's only somewhat-private room besides the bathrooms. The only other working VCR was in the kids' bedroom (my bedroom too). Believe me when I say I needed to see that tape REALLY BAD, but I couldn't risk waking up my younger brothers. So I draped my blanket and bedspread over the TV, VCR and myself, and proceeded to watch the tape about two feet away from the TV with the volume turned completely down. Let's just say my sex education was greatly enhanced, and it was well worth the risk of being caught! I was really sweating under those covers as I masturbated (twice), but my makeshift tent kept anyone else from hearing or seeing what I was doing.
- age 17, Ohio
I was on a Boy Scout camping trip two years ago, and I was going crazy because I hadn't masturbated for a couple of days. That night in the tent (with two other guys), I decided to see if I could relieve the tension without being heard. I was in a sleeping bag, and I used the quietest stroke I could and finally ejaculated into a sock. I was just drifting off to sleep when I heard another one of the guys masturbating in his sleeping bag! The next morning I told him I'd heard him but it was all right, because I'd done it too. It turned out all three of us had been trying to figure out ways to masturbate without being heard — but for the rest of the trip we beat off in our tent as soon as things had settled down. Our only problem was making sure the guys in the tents next to us didn't catch on, because Scouts aren't supposed to do stuff like that.
- age 16, Indiana
I was sitting in an airplane heading for Athens. I got excited watching a teenage girl a couple of rows behind me. She stared a lot, and then I got this great erection; nothing was able to stop it. My dad was sitting at my left side asleep. I put my jacket on my lap and then slid my hand into my trousers, and there I was masturbating in an airplane ... quite amazing I got an orgasm at all. I was 13.
- age 17, Sweden
My whole family was watching TV in the room right outside of mine, with a sliding door in between that doesn't lock. I had the urge, so I quietly did it in the dark, in my closet. It worked, and no one heard me.
- age 14, Ohio
When I was 18, I got pneumonia and had to go to the hospital. I was in a semi-private room with another guy. After 5 or 6 days I was feeling much better. One morning I woke up very horny, and since it had been over a week since I had last masturbated, I started to pull on my penis. In no time I knew I had to ejaculate, but at this point a nurse came in to check the other guy's blood pressure. With only a curtain separating us, I grabbed the tissue box and started pulling some out. It was quiet on their side but I had to have those tissues. I placed the tissues over my penis and filled them with fluid. I knew she might come over to my side, so I finished as fast as I could. I had just balled them up and had them in my hand when she came over to me. She gave me a smile and saw the tissues. She didn't say a thing about it. I don't know if she knew or not.
- age 25, Kentucky
The major time I had to handle my equipment was in World War II in the Army. None of us admitted that we masturbated in those days, but we did. Most of the time I would just make a tent of my blankets with my knees and play that way. At that time I didn't play for long — just to get my gun. By the way, I am still masturbating today. I ejaculate about every 3 days but play with myself every day.
- age 75, Texas
Just last night I was masturbating on the couch and my dad was in the same room. A blanket covered my penis so he couldn't see it, yet I had to jack slowly. It wasn't a very fun experience.
- age 15, Canada
I believe I was 13. We were driving on vacation, when I got an erection I had to get rid of. My mom, dad, and sister were in the van, but I whipped it out and masturbated the quietest I have ever done. I did it kind of quick and then wiped it on the seat. Nobody knew a thing!
- age 19, Michigan
It was right before opening night of our school play. I have a huge fear of getting an erection onstage, so I slipped out while another scene was being rehearsed, and I ran upstairs to the bathroom. I guess it worked — I didn't even get hard backstage that night.
- age 15, Florida
One time I was in a room with two other guys, and I didn't want them to know I was doing it. I had one of those erections that wouldn't go away, so I put the pillow over my mouth and breathed into it so they wouldn't hear me breathing all crazy. I just came in my hand. It was fun and scary.
- age 18, Indiana
I was on a ferry boat from Alaska to Seattle 26 years ago. The boat was pretty crowded, and a bunch of us were on the deck in our sleeping bags. In the middle of the night I noticed some guys were masturbating in their sleeping bags from the way the bags were tenting up and down in the mid portion. This got me very excited, and I started doing it myself. I did not want the sleeping bag to be tenting up and down, though, so I rolled my index finger just below the corona [the edge of the penis head]. The sensation was incredible, but no motion or sound could be seen or heard.
- age 46, Philippines
I share a room with my younger brother, so I have to be really careful. Honestly, though, I think he has tried masturbating and may know I do it too. All the same, I monitor his sleeping patterns — snores and breathing durations. Then I make sure that when I'm doing it I don't make any rubbing noises against my blanket. I have had a few close calls, though. It sucks to have to be quiet; I think it's more exciting to be able to vocally enjoy it.
- age 15, Washington
I was sleeping over at a friend's house with another friend. I hadn't masturbated in the past 24 hours, so I felt I needed to do it. He was in his bed and my other friend was on the floor right next to me. I knew I had to be quiet, because my friend would have made a big deal about it. I took off my clothes very quietly. I was in a sleeping bag, so I just made sure I didn't touch the bag. I thought I pulled it off, but the next day my friend said he knew — but he also told me he did it, too.
- age 14, Pennsylvania
Here's a method I've developed for masturbating quietly: Hold your penis head with one hand, and give a quick squeeze every 7/10ths of a second. This mimics the natural orgasmic contractions that happen during ejaculation. It is very quiet and too intense to describe. You have to have saved up a 5- to 7-day load for this to work.
- age 26, Indiana
During my freshman year in college, I lived in the dorms and had a roommate. I am an only child and had my own bedroom at home, so I was accustomed to having privacy at night when I wanted to masturbate. I basically had to find times to masturbate. Often, it would be when he was in class and I knew how much time I had. But, on occasion, I did masturbate at night with my roommate in the room. It would be after I was sure he was asleep; I could tell this by his snoring. I had to make sure of that, because we slept in bunk beds. I had to masturbate very slowly and keep track of how much I was moving and that I wasn't making any noise. I did this by masturbating dry and pulling my blanket and boxers off so he couldn't hear the rustle of cloth. When I ejaculated, I just wiped the semen off myself with my blanket. (I didn't want to make any noise with Kleenex.) Once, though, I discovered my roommate masturbating at night. I did not want to embarrass him, so I didn't say anything — but I knew he was doing it because the bunk bed was shaking, I heard the snap of the elastic of his underwear, and I could hear him breathing harder.
- age 22, Minnesota
I don't usually make a lot of noise when masturbating. I usually worry more about the time element (like in the bathroom).
- age 15, Oregon
Once when I was not quite 12, I went up to me and my older brothers' fort in the woods. It was so quiet that I didn't think anyone was there — but when I looked through a space in the boards, I happened to see my brother (who was 14 or 15 at the time) and two of his friends masturbating. I guess I wanted to see if my brother could ejaculate, so I just watched without making a sound. I pulled my penis out the bottom of my shorts and started masturbating like crazy. I tried to be as quiet as I could and not to move around much, because I would have been beaten up for sure if they saw me spying on them. I saw each one ejaculate and use leaves to wipe themselves off, and then I snuck away really quietly. I never said anything about it until a couple years later, when we were fighting about something — I was mad and wanted to embarrass him in front of his girlfriend.
- age 15, Ohio
My wife masturbates me occasionally but does not like it when I do it to myself. So, if I want to do it without her knowing, I have to be quiet — like in bed while she is sleeping. It's kind of neat to be able to do it without waking her up.
- age 54, Illinois
I was on an airplane flight direct to Italy (for 9 hours!). I HAD to masturbate — it wasn't a question. I finally went to the bathroom, used spit, and when I was about to ejaculate, I gently bit my tongue. If you ever have to masturbate quietly, GENTLY bite your tongue.
- age 14, Arizona
Our house has really cheap construction. All three bathrooms in our house are next to each other, and you can hear everything, so I worry that people can hear me when I masturbate. The hand lotion I use to lube myself up sounds really loud to me — especially right after you squirt some on — and sometimes if I am really into it, I throw my back against the toilet tank, and the lid moves. It's like everybody knows what you're doing. I used to leave the water running in the sink to drown out any noises, but then I thought that, too, might be suspicious. So now I keep a portable radio turned on in the bathroom and I also always flush the toilet right when I know I am about to ejaculate — because no matter how hard I try not to, I always moan or gasp a little. I probably don't make as much noise as I think, but it's better to be safe.
- age 16, West Virginia
I had a friend stay overnight a couple years ago. I was reading a sexy magazine, and I turned to the floor to see if my friend was asleep. It appeared to me that he was — so I pulled down my underpants and started masturbating, being ever so quiet. But ten seconds later, he turned to me and asked what time it was. I guess he wasn't sleeping. I told him, and he tried to go to sleep — so I kept going. But I had to hold my breath for a very long time, and every 45 seconds, I was letting out one huge exhale. I ejaculated ten minutes later, and after my last sigh, I heard my friend let out a small laugh. Guess he wasn't sleeping after all!
- age 16, Massachusetts
When I was in the Air Force and in college, I had roommates. I masturbated quietly by lying on my stomach under the blankets, grasping some of my undershorts, and pumping away into the mattress. I've always done it that way — you can be pretty quiet. Nobody ever said anything.
- age 37, California
In college, I had dorm and apartment roommates that shared the same bedroom, so quiet masturbation was a requirement. The bathroom was communal in the dorm and offered no privacy for getting off when the need arose. However, I managed to become quite good at masturbating while a roommate was around. While I was still under the sheets, I liked to take it really slow — since a quick jerking movement would make the springs squeak — and rub my fingers slowly over the shaft and concentrate on the area where the head connects. Using a bit of spit or my own pre-cum, I could speed up my fingers and eventually orgasm without ever moving my body around or making a sound. By my senior year, I would get brave and do it outside of the covers with my fist, but a roommate's snoring was a prerequisite for that maneuver!
- age 28, Texas
It was 3:00 in the afternoon. My mom and brother were home in the next room. I just had to spank it, so I told my mom I was taking a shower and turned on the fan, put the towel at the base of the door, greased up, and went on my way. I got close to the shower to drown out the sound. Then I took my shower.
- age 15, Colorado
The summer I turned 14, I went to a camp for two weeks. There were 7 other guys in my cabin, all my age or a year older. The only time or place we could masturbate safely was in our bunks at night, and even that wasn't very private. I was in a lower bunk, so I would wait until about a half hour after lights-out and then I would try to masturbate without making any noise. It took forever, and I still couldn't be sure somebody wasn't listening. About the third night, just before lights out, our college-age counselor said he wanted to talk to us. His first question was, "Is there anybody here who doesn't masturbate?" Nobody answered! He suggested that we make the time right after lights-out a voluntary masturbation time — and it worked! As soon as the lights were out, we'd have a relaxed (and very sexy) group masturbation session, with nobody feeling guilty about it. That counselor may have been only a 19-year-old kid, but he was smart enough to realize what we needed and to give us a way to enjoy it.
- age 21, Indiana