Watcher: "What the hell are you doing?" Me: "Oh, thank God you're here!" Watcher: "Why? What happened?" Me: "I just saw a massive, hairy spider!" Watcher: "And?" Me: "It crawled up my trousers and onto my penis! I was just trying to shake it off as you came in here, but it's gone now."
- age 17, Scotland
I would look at them and smile.
- age 65, Germany
I would try to put on a show, especially if I knew who it was. First, I would continue stroking normally, but I'd gradually start moaning, then cursing, and then screaming loudly. If the person were still there after that, I would pretend that she (hopefully it would be a girl) was the person I was fantasizing about and start talking to her. I would look in her direction several times, asking questions while I was turned that way to see if she would give a response. Before climaxing, I would move closer to her to try to entice her into joining. If it were a guy, I would probably do some of the same things to see if he would come out and masturbate with me.
- age 13, Wyoming
It would probably make me so hot that I would ejaculate soon after.
- age 33, Ohio
I'd just keep on stroking. I get quite excited when someone is watching and it is a big turn-on if I get "caught."
- age 15, Minnesota
Although I've almost been "caught" twice, if I were to be caught outright, depending on who is watching, I'd be too overcome with embarrassment and fear of their reaction to continue. I doubt I could even speak, aside from some inaudible mumbling. My only reaction would be to stop dead in my tracks and attempt to cover up, for whatever little it would be worth at that point.
- age 19, Scotland
I would be excited. I love being naked, with its feeling of being free. I think masturbating is much more fun and exciting when there is a chance of getting caught. If I were caught, I think I would keep on stroking. Whether male or female, they would know I was having a good time and with them staring at me, it would turn me on that much more. I have never had an experience like this, but I would enjoy the moment and keep stroking until I was done. Who knows, they might even want to join in!
- age 16, Connecticut
I would stop, cover it up, and try to explain myself. I would also hide out for a while.
- age 20, Pennsylvania
I would probably be in shock for hours!
- age 14, California
Wait a minute — are you saying it's *not normal* to be watched?
- age 32, New Jersey
I'd be scared yet aroused if it were a girl watching me.
- age 15, Florida
I'd get turned on even more! I'm a total exhibitionist, and the thought that someone was watching me would make me get very excited. I think I would become more animated (maybe thrusting my hips a bit or moving my hands faster) and make a total show of climaxing, complete with groaning and heavy breathing. Of course, all bets are off if it's the parents who are watching.
- age 18, Pennsylvania
I would start to stroke even harder. I get so very aroused when people watch me masturbate. I may even ask them to join me. If they want a show, I'll give them one they'll never forget!
- age 14, Missouri
I would probably just sit with a weird look on my face, totally empty, and wishing I could just be transported somewhere else to finish off what I had started. But that would never happen, so I would have to continue sitting there until the person who caught me either goes away or starts to talk to me. If the person goes away, I would continue masturbating to orgasm and then talk about it with them later.
- age 17, United Kingdom
If it were one of my parents, I'd cover up; if a female, I'd pretend not to notice, and put on a good show; but if a male, I'd ask him to leave.
- age 20, Canada
I would carry on masturbating and ejaculate all over them!
- age 14, United Kingdom
Well, since most of the time I masturbate in my room, the only people who would likely see me doing it would be my parents. I don't think I would do much. I think once they know what I am doing, they should just continue with whatever they were doing.
- age 21, California
I would say, "Do you mind? What I am doing is private. Next time, please knock!"
- age 14, Virginia (female)
Scream.
- age 17, United Kingdom
I'd freeze like a deer in the headlights and then try to cover up. Or, I'd move elsewhere — not to finish, but to die of embarrassment!
- age 42, California
I would probably either try to explain it, or I'd deny it.
- age 12, Pennsylvania
If I thought my wife was watching me I'd probably stop immediately, go very limp, and feel rather embarrassed. However, if I realized that my 11-year-old son was watching, I'd like to think I would keep going normally. I'd hate to give him the impression there is something wrong with stroking your penis, especially when he's just getting to the age of experimenting, himself.
- age 27, Belgium
I never masturbate where I can be seen by anybody outside my house; I do it either in my room, or maybe out on the couch when I'm home alone (but then the blinds are closed). When I do it in my room, I don't lock the door. Sometimes, the door is even cracked because my masturbation is casual among my mom, sister, and me. It is just us 3, and they know I do it; we even joke about it sometimes. But if my mom or my sister were watching me, I wouldn't care.
- age 15, Florida
If they were close by, I'd ask them if they wanted to join me. If they were farther away, I'd wave.
- age 57, Georgia
I would ask the person if I'm as big as they expected.
- age 17, Michigan
I would just keep up the pace. Whoever is watching is doing so because they *want* to watch. People don't watch because they *don't* want to see it. So, I'd give them the show they want to see.
- age 40, Massachusetts
I'd drop the banana and stop. Then, I'd shut the door or the window or whatever, pick up the banana, and finish up. Then I would go and find the person who was watching and get in their face about it.
- age 17, California
Wow! This would turn me on to no end. I would definitely continue and even put on quite a show, making myself last as long as possible and using all sorts of body language to indicate intense pleasure. This is a wild fantasy of mine. If the onlooker and I were in the same room, I might even invite him or her to join me.
- age 34, Massachusetts
I would get pretty freaked out. But I'm usually good about keeping my masturbation secret. If my mom caught me, I would probably get my computer taken away and get yelled at. If a guy saw it — well, I would invite him to help me out.
- age 15, Illinois (female)
If it were some freak off the street staring into my apartment building, I would be inclined just to run them off. If it were someone I had an interest in, like the guy across the way who's always walking around his place in his underwear, I might just keep going to see how things turn out. But that would require that I keep the blinds open, which I never do.
- age 19, New York
If it were my little brother, who's 11, I probably wouldn't get angry because if he has a question or whatever, we talk about that stuff. If it were either one of my parents, I don't know what I'd do. I have never talked to my dad about it, so I don't know what his attitude is toward masturbation. If it were my dad, I would just probably get a talk where he'd tell me it's normal because he did it when he was a teenager.
- age 13, Missouri
Maybe some people are calm enough to segue this situation into an encounter pleasing to both the observer and the observed; or maybe others are content to simply finish themselves off paying no mind to the fact that they are being watched. I'm sorry, but I know I would freak and try to cover up what was going on (as I have in the past with varying degrees of success). If it was not totally obvious what I was doing, I suppose I would tell the person to give me a second to finish getting dressed. Otherwise I'd have no choice but to run away.
- age 25, Texas
I would stop for a second to tell the guy who is watching me, "This is private. Please stop watching me."
- age 17, Indiana
If it was my mom or dad I'd be both mad and embarrassed, but mostly embarrassed. Then I would stop, pull up my pants, and tell them to leave. Afterwards, alone, I'd apologize to my mom but ask her next time to please knock first. With my dad, I'd do the same, but it might help to talk more about masturbation, and I could ask him things. If it was my sister (who's 12) I'd really be embarrassed and pull up my pants. If it were my best friend, I'd be kind of embarrassed, but ask him if he wanted to join in instead of watching. If nothing else, we could talk together about masturbation. Right now I don't talk about it with him or anyone else.
- age 14, California
If my parents were watching, I'd probably jump up and be like, "Uh, sorry, what did you say?" But if it were my boyfriend, I'd definitely ask him to join me. I feel much more comfortable about that sort of thing with him.
- age 15, Montana (female)
My immediate reaction would be to make sure they got a good show. If I knew the location of the person I would make sure they would get a better view. I would let them know how much I'm enjoying what I'm doing. I'd finish the job with a big smile and maybe a wink! I love watching as much as being watched.
- age 35, Georgia
I would scream, "Help! My hand is choking my penis!"
- age 15, Missouri
I would say I thought my tampon got stuck.
- age 18, Canada (female)
I live with just my dad, and he has walked in on me many times. I would do like I always do and just say, "Pop, I'm kind of busy 'collecting my thoughts' right now." That's our term for it. He would, and has said the same thing to me. We don't have a locked-door policy in our house. It's no big thing. From what I've seen, I think he does it twice as much as I do.
- age 17, Texas
As the original "stealth wanker," I realize that this answer is hypothetical. However, since many of my friends know that I masturbate frequently, I would continue if one of them saw me. If it were my JW pen pal, I'd invite him to join me. If it were my best friend of 24 years, I would tell him I'd be done shortly. He is a private person; I know he wouldn't join me. He wouldn't mind, because he has heard me masturbating before and praises my energy, duration, and vocalizations. Now that I think about it, I'm more likely to be heard than seen.
- age 61, Michigan