Aggravation

I was not one of those boys who just happened to discover masturbation on his own. I needed to be taught. Thank goodness I found a good teacher: My best friend in 6th grade taught me the fine art of masturbation.

One day while in school, Tim told me that he had something he needed to show me and asked if I wanted to spend the night at his house over the weekend. Although I begged for him to tell me what it was, he said he couldn't show me at school. All week I anxiously awaited the unveiling of whatever it was that Tim gleefully told me, "You aren't going to believe it until you see it."

That Friday, I packed my gym bag and headed to Tim's house right after school. We ate pizza and watched TV. As soon as Tim's parents were off to bed, Tim said to me, "Do you know what masturbation is?" I told him, "Isn't that what happens when a women has her period?" Tim said, "No, stupid, that's menstruation. I'm talking about something that makes you feel good."

I followed Tim to the bathroom. He closed the door. Much to my surprise, Tim removed his jeans and stood in front of me with an erection in his white briefs. Tim said, "Okay, now watch — I'm going to show you something that you are going to love to do." Tim removed his briefs and stood in front of the sink. He took some soap and lathered his hands. He put the soap onto his penis and started to masturbate. I stood there not knowing what to do.

After a few minutes, Tim said, "Why don't you try it? You are gonna like it." I removed my jeans and then my briefs. I followed Tim's instructions and put some soapy lather on my erection. Tim kneeled on the floor and continued to masturbate. I kneeled alongside him. After a few more minutes, Tim started to groan. I wasn't sure what he was doing, but whatever it was, it seemed like he was an expert at it. After a few more groans, Tim shot some white stuff onto the floor. I continued to masturbate. After what couldn't have been more than 30 seconds, my body twitched and shuddered. My first orgasm. But unlike Tim, nothing came out of my penis. I thought mine was broken. Tim told me that nothing came out of his penis when he first started masturbating, but that soon changed.

Over the next year, I spent just about every Friday night at Tim's. Being children of the '70s, we often played the board game "Aggravation." Aggravation became our code word for masturbation. Tim would see me in school and ask, "Do you want to play Aggravation after school today?" I never told Tim no. Just as he had predicted, a few months after we started "playing Aggravation," I started to ejaculate. I vividly remember my first ejaculation. I was kneeling on the bathroom floor and ejaculated onto the side of the bathtub. I thought my heart was going to stop. Orgasms without ejaculation were wonderful, but they were simply spectacular with ejaculation. Now I knew what Tim meant!

All through my teen years, I continued to masturbate while kneeling on the bathroom floor. I did, however, give up using lather as lube. I found that I, unlike Tim, actually preferred masturbating "dry." I also discovered that although I am circumcised, I have enough foreskin left to move it over my penis head. Tim thought that masturbating this way was quite odd, and he actually grimaced the first time I saw him try it. He simply didn't have enough foreskin.

After high school, I attended a local college, so I continued to live at home. By now, my daily masturbation locale changed from the bathroom to my bedroom. I also started masturbating while lying on the bed rather than kneeling on the floor. All through my 20s and well into my 30s, I often masturbated twice a day: once in the morning after waking up, and once in the evening before falling to sleep. I would usually ejaculate into a tube sock that I had turned inside out. I could "hide the evidence" by simply turning the tube sock right-side-out.

As I've grown older, my masturbation sessions have fallen to just 4 or 5 times a week. However, they are longer and much more intense than they were when I was a teenager. When I do masturbate, it is no longer a race to the finish but a leisurely stroll.

I can't imagine masturbation not being a part of my weekly routine. Even though my partner and I have an active sex life, masturbation fulfills a need that only I can fulfill. Nothing is more satisfying than knowing I have made myself feel good. My 40th birthday is next week, and it has been almost 28 years since Tim taught me to masturbate. Tim was a wonderful teacher, and I undoubtedly became one of his best students.